Today I got to the event and saw a big crowd around the NVIDIA booth ooohing and aaaaahing about something. As I stepped up, the crowd parted like the Red Sea to reveal...another SLI machine. What the (bleep)???? This machine was built by Kibutz, a local Spanish PC builder and had an ASUS Vento 3000 chasis in fire engine red. I was not told there would be another machine on this tour. Are the folks back at HQ unhappy with me? Did I not show them a good time in Turkey? I let them play with me allllllllllll night and didn't even break a sweat!

Maybe this thing is an impostor? I started telling everyone how they had to be sure it's really SLI - because if it's not NVIDIA SLI-Certified, it's definitely NOT SLI. If you're laying down some dough you can't accept some hacked imitation! But then I heard a voice coming from the Kibutz PC...it was a "she"...and she said to me in a sultry (but rather lispy) thick Spanish accent, "Por favorrrrrr, mi eth SLI-thertified...tu want to see?"

It was then I started hearing violins and harps. The clouds parted and a light came down from the heavens. They have sent me an angel. I can see it now...we're skipping down fields of daisies, our power cords wrapped around each other, laughing without a care in the world. We tumble and wrestle...and I end up nuzzling on those twin, round...vents.

I love this country. Getting to the event today I noticed that there was a new tournament sign up...and there were about 100 gamers lined up. I did a double take when I realized...they were all GIRLS. And by girls I don't mean just girls - these were hot chicks who play video games! Swedish. French. Chinese. American. It was like visiting the "Small World" ride at Disneyland. They were all playing CounterStrike. All I could think of was, wow, baby...CounterStrike, CounterStrike: Source...whatever it is, bring it on so I can rock your world. Huhmanah huhmanah.

But I had to contain myself - I couldn't pimp myself out like some cheap 2-dollar ride because...well, I've got myself a Spanish love. We had a great time last night - dancing the flamenco, eating churros con chocolate, knocking back pitchers of sangria... I know there's 10 stops on this tour, but I may just have to stop here.

But then again, the next stop is Brazil. Land of lingerie supermodels. Who am I to deny them of my super charged performance? Well, for now, this love machine should probably continue on the tour. Adios Barcelona. Adios mi amor...we'll dance the 3DMark flamenco again soon.